Thursday, May 22, 2014

Timothy Benjamin - Son of My Right Hand

Me & Tim 2007
I have been thinking a lot about my role as a parent this week. I don't know why this week instead of any other, but probably because Michelle is out of town visiting her sister this week, so I have been left to see just how poorly I parent as a single dad! It has been quite humbling and I am only more grateful for Michelle and all that she does.

On Monday of this week, I took Timothy to Children's Hospital in Dallas to get an MRI done for a growth that he has on his tongue (I'll spare you all a picture). The doctor's weren't worried that it was cancerous or anything, but the MRI is supposed to rule that out. It took the doctor a few days to get back in touch with me with the results, but here is a summary.
  1. They think he has a lymphatic malformation.
  2. They think it is benign.
  3. He was probably born with it and it just surfaced for the first time.
  4. Even if they do surgery to flatten it out and carve down the worst of the swelling, it is likely to resurface at some point again.
So as a parent, I understand that means that I'll have to see my little boy go through surgery more than once. I called Michelle and we both grieved over our sweet little guy having to go through something so tough.

Timothy was there when I talked to Michelle and it was the first that time that he got to hear the results too. We had to get going after dinner because Emily had a choir performance tonight, so I didn't get a chance to talk to him and see how he took the news.

After we got home from Emily's performance tonight, I sat Timothy down and just talked to him one on one. I told him again what the doctor said, how they want to treat it, and that it may come back. His eyes got really big and he said, "What?!? You mean they'll have to do it again?!?"

I answered him full of sorrow for what it might mean and how he might take the news and simply said, "Yes, that's right."

His reply, with a smile on his face, "Well, that's ok, I'll probably get used to it."

I love that boy.

We picked the name Timothy because we wanted him to serve the way Timothy did in the New Testament, and I chose Benjamin because it means, "Son of My Right Hand." From a personality standpoint, Timothy is definitely the most easy-going of all our kids, and his personality matches mine in a lot of ways. But tonight I saw how differently he trusts than I do. He has a childlike faith because he is a child. He trusts. He trusts his parents, the doctors, and his Jesus.

Lord help me to have the same faith and trust when I face difficulties...

Timothy 5/19/2014